Merry Christmas

Dear Friends & Family

What can I saw about the previous year other than God is truly good. As most of you are aware I was able to spend five months down in Brazil this past year working with Missionaries from my church affiliated with Brazil Gospel Fellowship. Their ministries focus on a school they began in 2001 for native kids. The school is called Alfa and serves nearly 300 students. In Brazil kids begin school at between the ages of 18 months old to 2 years and must be potty trained. For the parents out there you can relate to how difficult that can be. They have four years of kindergarten and Alfa has students through 9th grade. If you want to hear more about Ken & Lori Stucky and their ministries read about them here
http://www.loristucky.blogspot.com or http://www.bgfmission.com/MSStuckyKen.html

They have been recognized locally and nationally in Brazil for the quality of education provided and have been called a “great benefit to the communities they serve”, by government officials. Alfa provides the kids with sound Christian principles as well as a good education. The other main ministry they have is a small church, Christ is Life Church. They have a small congregation of about 40 people currently; they are continually sending out members from their church to leadership positions in other churches and have sent off a number of families as missionaries to other parts of Brazil. Much of my time working with them was leading the Youth Group for the entire time I was there. Teaching and playing games with them as well as helping to plan activities and short trips.

I was also given the opportunity of filling the pulpit for 2 months near the end of my time there. As many of you are aware I am not particularly adept at public speaking, so this challenge was especially difficult for me as not only was I preaching God’s word, but it was done through a translator into a different language. I must admit that this was one of the most difficult things I have had to do in my life. It was a constant challenge for me to find the words and the courage to stand up there each Sunday and hopefully present a relevant message to the lives of those present. The prayers of all who were lifting my efforts up to God where and are very much appreciated. For anyone who wants to hear more details about my time in Brazil I kept a blog of my trip at - http://followingfootsteps.blogspot.com .

I returned to the US at the end of July and was grateful that I had my job still waiting for me. I am thankful given the situation that many people found themselves in this past year on unemployment. Though working in an Emergency Children’s Shelter has many difficulties and is stressful many nights dealing with extreme emotional situations it has been a rewarding experience. Though it doesn’t feel like it many nights I have had the opportunity to touch the lives of kids that do not have many positive things in their lives.

I have also been blessed with my involvement in a small group of Christian men each Thursday evening. We get together weekly and spend time in God’s word and fellowshipping together. God had been working on my greatly through this group and I am thankful for the impact each of them has had in my life. The small group of four has grown to five now and I look forward to the opportunity of more in the coming year.

Finally, I want to say thank you to all of you who have impacted my life not just over the past year, but through every stage of life that God has led me. I know I am not perfect by any stretch of any ones imagination, but I would be far less than I am without each and every one of you in my life. I know I do not say it often, if ever to some of you, but my life is joyful because of you, and I pray that each of you have many people in your lives like you.

Who I am

I just realized today a lesson in life that God has been trying to teach me for at least a year. It has been on of the hardest lessons I have had to learn because of the pain that I have begun to realize that this has caused in other people and the difficulties it has placed on every relationship in my life. I, like most people I think, had an image of who I was and also that of what I was not. I have built this image up over my life by the choices I have made and observing the people around me. We each have this perception of who we are and what we want to become, but for me I God has finally taken me to a place where I was ready to see the truth and not the fiction that I had constructed in my own mind of who I was. I am not a good, honest, faithful man of God as I had lead myself to believe that I was. I have come to realize that many of the things that I had convinced myself that I believed and held as truths had in fact only been part of this costume I had been stitching together over my life to convince myself I was more than I was. It has taken God 33 years and especially the last one to finally tear down, or to begin to rip the stitches loose from this facade that I can see inside and glimpse the real me. I am in fact a very selfish, arrogant, manipulative person. Three things that I had been trying to tell myself most of my life that I never was going to become, but in fact already am. I have used many cloaks of deception for myself and others to try and hide this truth excusing these realities through things like duty, honor, faith and even God. Trying to explain them away by shifting the focus away from who I actually am and trying to justify them through whatever was handy at the time. I have had to come to realize that I have been running and hiding from myself for much of my life and do not know now what to do with myself. I do not know who I am anymore, not that I ever really did because I was always hiding who I was and trying to pretend to be something I never could be as long as I was unwilling to open my eyes and really take a look in the mirror of reality. The constructed fantasy of who I was, was better than having to face the reality of what I wasn't. I have lived a life hidden and in fear of the truth, but if the Bible is true it is only in the truth that you can be set free. While it seems odd that the process of letting go of the chains that bind me to a false reality should be painful to let go of they are extremely so. The last two days have been a harsh and painful time of seeing the truth, and only a very small piece of it at that. It is that moment when you walk out of a pitch dark room that you have been sitting in trying to see for so long that the light of a single small candle flame is enough to make you wince in pain at the brightness of the light. god is so gracious in the fact that He only uses a small flicker of candle light to awaken our eyes to the truth and not the full glory of who He is that would burn us to ash at first glimpse because of the darkness that has been our world. I want to seek the forgiveness of all those that I have wronged and treated unkind over the years. Those that I have pressured and pushed, talked down to, tried to make you feel stupid or insignificant because I did not agree with you. I want those that feel I have treated them less than honorably to write to me so that I can seek your forgiveness and understand how my actions have been a curse upon those that I have treated unfairly. It took the courage of a few people in my life to help me understand some of the depths of my own sin in this area and my iron will that I have cast so harshly against other people and the damage that it may have caused. I want to thank those of you who have been willing to talk with me over the past couple days helping me see the truth of who I am and helping me understand better the depths of my own self disillusion and deception. It is a hard thing to take a look at your life and realize that you have not even been honest with yourself about who you are and the motivations for your own actions. I really believed that I was so different than who I was and that my desires were honest and sincere at least that is what I had convinced myself of. Thank you God for being patient and merciful in all things for those things that we do not deserve that you provide us with because you are compassionate. I hope that someday I can begin to better portray God in my own life than I have been able to do thus far and truly live an example of His son to the world I live in.

Coming to the end

Well my time here in Brazil is running short and I thought it would be a good time to reflect a bit on my time here. While I still do not speak Portuguese (sad to admit) I have come a ways in my ability to understand some of it. I am now able to pick out words in conversations that I hear and some time even understand the concepts being spoken of but am not anywhere close to what I would have liked to be able to do with the language. I had big hopes that spending 5 months here immersed in the culture and language that I would have been able to carry on conversations at a basic level, but it was not to be. My time here was directed into another path by God. I was given the opportunity to minister in a needed way that I do not really enjoy doing, but my time here was not about doing what I like, but meeting the needs of others. So I got to spend 6 weeks preaching in the Church here and ministering to them through God's word. I am thankful for the opportunitty, but I would be a liar if I said I enjoyed it all the time. I am grateful for the time studying God's word that it gave me, but I still do not like standing behind the pulpit. I am grateful for the lives that I know God touched through my time behind the pulpit and thank Him for the part I got to play in that.

Also during my time here I was given the opportunity to teach the Youth Group here from March through June. I learned many lessons through the experience of teaching through a translator (as well as when I was preaching through a translator) that it is possible to keep the basics simple and still be profound in teaching God's word. The subjects do not have to be made complicated in order to make people think deeply about them. The simple truth contained in God's word is often more than enough to spark thinking in most people. It is presenting it to them in a way that they can understand easily but outside of the mundane manner they have understood it previously. And I will admit that was often difficult in this situation, because I only have a basic understanding of the culture and the daily lives and needs of the people here. That brings me to my next lesson that my teaching here has taught me. It does not matter what culture, language, or people you teach the basic needs of all people do not change. Yes that does include the need for God, but on much more human need issues as well. I have come to believe that people everywhere struggle with the same basic issues, although they are expressed differently because of culture and tradition. The root issues are all the same world wide. The quote from Solomon that "there is nothing new under the sun," has come to have new meaning for me. That though the problems may look different, the symptoms look different, and the language and manner they are expressed in look different than what I am used to seeing it is the same need that is being expressed. We all have a desire to be needed, loved and wanted. We all crave to be of use and have significance to ourselves and others. We want to know that we matter in more than just what we can do for someone else. and for most of us we have been willing to seek out those things in improper manners because we either do not know how to seek them properly or they have not been met in the proper way by others.

My time here has given me many opportunities to read and study that I have not had (or maybe just not taken advantage of) in my routine back in the states (or maybe my mind and heart have just been freed here to see things differently). One of the first books I was recommended to read was "The Heavenly Man," about the life of Brother Yun. It walks through the life of a house church leader in China and the persecution and torture that he received in China while he followed God's leading to build up the church of China. It was a powerful witness to me personally about what it should look like to follow after God wholeheartedly. I am not saying that unless you are being tortured for your faith that you are not following God but there are some amazing principles in his life that I think do. Persecution has always seemed to make the church focus on what is truly important and rely upon the strength of God than on the strength of man. This is greatly shown in this work and provides a testimony of the power that God still displays in our world for those that are willing to answer as Isaiah did, "Here I am send me(Isa 6:8)." When we are sold out and committed to follow God even through the difficult and hard issues of life He always provides us with the means, the strength, and courage to walk trough them. And in that testimony provides faith and encouragement to others who watch us as we do such things that they thought impossible, because they look to their own strength to accomplish them. The Bible teaches us that not even Jesus did the miracles that where performed by Him on earth in His own power, but it was the Father working through Him (Acts 2:22). We are told that if we have faith as little as a mustard seed that we can move mountains, and greater things than Jesus performed on the Earth, but we do not see those things today because of the littleness of our faith. Jesus reprimanded His own disciples repeatedly for being of little faith. The same men that later performed great signs and wonders in the power of the Spirit could not even understand scripture plainly when they were with God, but once the Spirit of God came upon them became bold proclaimers of the truth. The same can be true of us if we would devote ourselves to Him and stop doubting what the scriptures teach (James 1:6-8). The life of Brother Yun is a great witness to the power that is available through God to all of us. The manner in which he lived his life and relied upon God at almost every stage of his life is a powerful truth to each of us. I say almost every stage of his life because there are recorded within those pages times of doubt and pride that he willing tells of and how they negatively impacted his life and ministry. Just as they do for each of us everyday. As it says in James when we doubt we should expect to receive nothing from the Lord, but when we pray and believe that it will be done for us in accordance with His desire it will happen. James 4 tells us that if we do not receive it is because we did not ask, and if we ask and did not receive it is because we asked with the wrong motives. If you are desiring to spend some time in a book that I believe can challenge you with a modern day testimony of God's power and mercy to mankind find a copy of this book and open your minds to the possibility that God still works in a powerful way even in our days.

I have also seen God work in my own life giving me guidance and leading me along paths to seek Him. I have always liked the verse in Matthew 6:33-34 "But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. 34 "So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." But it is hard to live our lives one day at a time. We all want to make plans for the future and plan out the steps we need to take to accomplish the things we desire. Or to put away a little something for tomorrow so that if something bad happens we know we have a security blanket to fall back on so that our comfort will not be diminished even a little if we can help it. But this is not what God wants us to do. He wants us to rely upon Him every minute of every day and we can not do that as long as we are relying upon of nest egg or our own storehouses. Luke 12:15-21 tells the parable of the man who stored up grain in storehouses so that he could live an easy life and Jesus is reprimanding this kind of attitude. We are not promised tomorrow and do not know the number of days that have been allotted to us, but we are promised that if we live for God the time we have will not be ill spent and our rewards will be great in heaven.

Well I am no different than anyone else these principles are difficult to live by even once in a while, but they are how we are to live. We are to surrender our lives completely to God and follow where He leads and accept His control over our lives, being living sacrifices to Him. We are not to desire for our own comfort, but to serve Him taking up our cross daily and following after our LORD. And He has promised that if we live a surrendered life to Him that we will always have all that we NEED, maybe not all the things that we believe we need, but everything that is required for life and service to Him. We are not promised to have material comforts in this life, but we are promised joy and peace that surpasses all understanding if we will live for Him. This is not a post claiming things that I have achieved but even a personal encouragement to myself on how I should be living. My life is far from exemplifying these principles but they are what I am trying to strive for and I know that I fail almost completely in them each and everyday as I grab things in my life back from God and think I know better how to handle them, or just am too afraid to let God do with them as He pleases. Living life for God is scary, because we all want control of our lives and to know what lies ahead for us, or at least be able to make some kind of plans. To walk through life not knowing what lies ahead or the path we will take in getting there is terrifying. I am often afraid of what it is God will lead me into next, or the difficulties that I will endure once I get there. Our flesh cries out for comfort and knowledge but we can not live for God as long as we are living for our flesh. We have to believe and trust that God is really in control of all things and that He truly loves us. That His plans for our life is really what is best for us and have faith that His word is true and that He will never lead us into anything that He will not lead us through. That He will not strand us in the middle of a dark and evil place, but that if we may walk through the valley of the shadow of death that He is by our side and is able to furnish a table before us in the midst of enemies and we be perfectly secure because He is their to guard us. Ephesisans 6 tells us that if we are clothed in the armor of God that we can withstand any attack of evil and stand in the days of trials for we are protected by Him who created all things and is able to overcome anything that has been created. But I along with many of you stand trembling in our armor as all Israel did before Goliath. Though we may think that the God and creator of all that is stand with us we cower before one who has been created and yet defies the creator. How I hunger to stand as David did as a small boy and say that God will enable me to overcome you for you are against God and I stand for God. And standing before a giant towering over me have the courage in my God to race towards him without any armor and only a sling shot at this heavily armored giant with full confidence that I will prevail because my God is with me. But I often run away from enemies much smaller and less fierce than Goliath was. A mere whisper of rebuke can turn me back to huddle in a corner pleading for rescue. There is a great song by Casting Crowns that teases me with the idea of this that i so eagerly desire called "The Voice of Truth."

Well, i guess I have rambled long enough for a reflections post and will leave you with the song from Casting Crowns, just click the link and listen to the words. I hope it will encourage you to stand for God and live your live for Him and not turn and run from opposition to the truth arises. Be modern day Davids and stand against Goliath on a field of Battle.

The Voice of Truth Song

The End of Men

The End of Men

I had a friend post this article on Facebook and thought it was well worth sharing. Click the link and take a few minutes to read it and let it sink in. this is a possible future for not only America, but the world in general.

234

That is right today marks the 234th anniversary of the signing of the Declaration of Independence. It was today so many years ago that a group of average citizens came together and with one voice declared that they would no longer stand idle as they were being oppressed by tyranny. They declared to the world that they had come to the end of their patience and peaceful attempts to rectify so many injustices that caused an entire nation of people to rise up against over whelming odds and take control of their own destiny. The United States was born by the blood of farmers and blue collar workers as well as the money of wealthy land owners and diplomats. It was a singular event that the entire population stood together as a single entity and stepped forward into history as the newest nation and one that declared that there is a God and Judge of the world and in His name we declare that we seek justice. The poor, the slave and the wealthy stood shoulder to shoulder in defiance of (at that time) the greatest military power on the planet and sacrificed all that they held dear to win what they could only have hoped for on this day 234 years ago. And God blessed this countries birth greatly and has so many time over the years continued to bless us, but I think His patience is wearing thin.

I think of those days with great remorse because of what we have done with that victory that was so dearly won. I think if those men were alive today they would be redrafting the Declaration of Independence and sending it to the Government declaring that they have stepped well beyond the bound of what was declared by our founding fathers. That they have become the tyrant that our founders had fought so hard against to win a freedom that has today been squandered and treated cheaply. The blood of the patriots that fought and died to bring freedom has been traded for creature comforts and a mentality of entitlement. So today take a look at what it was back then and what we have become today and see if you think those that died would be proud to stand by your side when you evaluate what you have done with the freedom they died for.

Take 9 minutes and listen to the Declaration being read aloud really hear the words that where penned for freedom - Declaration of Independence

Sorry Brazil

Well today as many of you may not be aware of was a sad day in the life of many Brazillians. Their desire for a 6th World Cup title failed at the hands of the Netherlands [Yeah for you Alycia :) ]. Even though I am not a Soccer (Futbol) fan much at all I had been watching and cheering for the US and giving a hard time to those cheering for Brazil during they games. It has been an interesting time watching the craze of Soccer fanaticism here. I have never seen a sport grip the daily life of an entire nation as World Cup Soccer has done here. Coming from a Country with an extreme amount of national sports to watch and cheer for on television and in person it is strange to see one single sport hold the attention of a nation as this last couple weeks has done here. In the US even the Super Bowl, March Madness, and MLB Playoffs wrapped up into a single event would compare to the mania that has been exhibited here. People were decorating the streets, painting their cars and houses team colors (and I don't mean just a few of them), Brazilian flags flying from many new windows and most cars. The dress has turned to Green and Yellow with a little blue and white to match national colors. People gather together outside on the sidewalks to watch the games (even the ones Brazil is not playing in) and talk about it every day. I do mean everyone talks about it. It is in every conversation that is going on.
There is nothing else going on in life here except soccer. So today with the dreams of yet another World Cup dashed against the coast of Holland. So my heart goes out to all those in Brazil tonight crying themselves to sleep with the thought of waiting another 4 years to take a chance at adding to there World Cup collection. (And you might think I am joking but there were hundreds of people crying their way home after the loss today).

Oh I will never be doing that . . . .

I don't know about the rest of you, but I have said that phrase a number of times with all the intentions in the world of it being the truth. I remember saying as I graduated High School that I would never be going on for more school. I was done, I had had enough, but sure enough in the end I have completed 2 advanced degrees and am still working towards a third. I remember saying as a child that I would never spank my kids, but yet I had a discussion the other day where I affirmed that spanking is sometimes a necessity as a form of discipline sometimes required to curb certain behaviors. Well most recently I remember talking to several students in a preaching class that this would not be used much in my life as I never intended to become a preacher, and yet low and behold here I am about to finish my sixth week behind the pulpit, but not just any pulpit, but one in another country being translated into a different language to a different culture. I sit and wonder how this has happened. So many times in life it seems the God leads us into those things that we fear or dislike to teach us that we need to rely upon Him more than our own abilities. It is like anytime I say that is something I will never do God says ok well you just wait and see. While I am sure that I have not yet learned my lesson I think I am closer to not tempting God to help me work on any more fears or dislikes that I may have. all those areas that I do not feel gifted for or that I dislike always seem to be the areas that God sends me into. I remember just before I came on this missions internship if I was planning on becoming a full time missionary, and my response was, I really don't think so, but I believe that I will be working with missionaries in a support role of some sort. And yet again after almost four months on the field I can feel a direct guiding of God that someday in the maybe not so far future I will be heading out raising support (one of the most hideous of all tasks) to hit the field someowhere around the world to serve as His ambassador for the Kingdom. Just one more thing that I decided I would not do that God has decided is where He wants me to go. So to all of you back home and reading my babbling through my times here keep me in your prayers as I try to discern God's ultimate plan, or maybe just His near future plans for my life. that I would be open to anything that He has for me and I would listen closely to His directions. Thanks and may His great blessings be upon all of you.

Writers Block

Did you ever get the feeling when you are studying scripture for a purpose that maybe there is something in there you are supposed to find or that is relevant to your life that you just can't quite make out? I have been trying to prepare and write my sermon for Sunday evening on Ephesians 5:15-21 and after 3 days of trying to get it out on paper I have only about 1/3 of what I need to fill the time. And getting that far has been like trying to walk through runny mud with brick shoes. I know that I am not a polished or experienced preacher by any stretch of imagination, but this is even odd for me. I have been studying and praying the entire week about this and have just been left high and dry on a sand bar without rescue in sight, and my time is running short as I got about 27 hours till I have to stand up and give God's word to His people. So I guess what I am looking for is some willing friends to join my in prayer for this that God's will is made evident to me so I can present His truth to those needing to hear it. thanks.

Dunes II

Ok well it was a success for most of the night. The kids had a blast out running the dunes and experiencing things many of them had only dreamed of doing before last night.
There were a total of 14 students out of the 18 that attend youth group that were able to attend and all of them did. They had to meet certain requirements to be eligible for the trip. The first was that they had to have attended at least 7 of the 11 meetings of the youth group to this point. Next it cost them 12 reais (about $6). The last was they had to receive permission from their parents. While there were a few bumps along the way, and I don't just mean in the roads, the evening did what we hoped it would.
We got the fire up and going to roast the hot dogs (cachorro-quente), we had long sticks for them to roast their own on (which i must say I think was one of the highlights of the night). And through the process not one dog was lost into the coals, which given the jockeying for position that ensued during the cooking process was surprising. We then took advantage of the night and position close to the ocean, with a multitude of stars over head to talk about the creation. Reading through the Biblical account of creation and talking about what they have been taught in school and what many others believe about how we came to be. It went a little slow as I tried to represent creation with sand water and kiddy toys, borrowed from Ron's children, as the verses where read in Portuguese aloud.

Never realized just how complicated creation was until I tried to do it looking for the proper prompts in a language I do not understand all that well just yet. I also know that I am not God, not that I had any thought that I was, because I forgot to "create" the creatures of the sea in the proper order ooppss. The birds of the air went on by themselves without the creatures of the sea until after the beasts of the Earth when I remembered that I forgot the fishies. So now that I have cleared up in my head that I am not God we finished up with the culmination of God's creation with Adam and Eve. Created in His image and not the spawn of mutated primates.

After the lesson and a little discussion we proceeded on to a game which had the kids traipsing all over dunes and valleys in search of signs in the dark with instructions on them for the next target. While there was a bit of confusion and a few becoming lost in the darkness. In the end all where found and the kids found their way back with the guiding light of Ron's 2mil candle power spot light which cut through the night across the tops of several dunes to show the way home to those lost sheep (it worked really good for the sun during the creation narrative as well).

We ended the night tired and covered with sand and smiles as everything was loaded back up into the vehicles and we head for home. We ended the night in Ken's yard with some cookies, juice and some talk about the evening. There were some weary eyes and tired legs, but not a frown in the bunch. I am told the next outing (at the end of another 11 weeks) will be an overnight camping trip close by.

I am saddened that I will not be around for this as my time here ends in just a short 7 more weeks. While I must admit that the heat and the intense sun has been a burden to me after coming out of the frozen tundra that was Omaha the beginning of March when I arrived here. I am going to miss so many things when I have to board that plane heading back to a similar heat in Omaha. The people here, though I am not able to communicate effectively on my own, have welcomed me into their homes, churches, and lives with eagerness. They have been patient with me as I tried to absorb some of their language and have constantly encouraged me in the process of learning their culture and customs. It has also been a great blessing to reconnect with many of the people and places I was blessed to see on my first time down in 2005. I was amazed at how many people here still remember the time we spent here, though it was a short 12 days 5 years ago.

Well, I pray that all of you are well, and that the blessings of God have been abundant in your lives. I should get back and do a little prep before church this evening where I am again filling the pulpit for week number 4. To all of you who may do this week to week you have my most sincere admiration. It is a difficult thing to stand before the word of God weekly. To sit and read His word seeking out truth and application that He wants presented to His people. Knowing that in doing so you are placing yourself under the acute and discerning eye of God every time you come before man and teach His word. James 3:1 "Let not many of you become teachers, my brethren, knowing that as such we will incur a stricter judgment." It is a great burden that each carries when He brings the Word of God before man, and for all who do regularly you have my prayers and envy. Because it is a burden I do not feel I am capable of bearing for any extended period of time, and it is only through His great mercies that I will prevail in this task now. So if you have someone in your life who consistently and honestly teaches you from God's word give them a bit of encouragement for their labors on your behalf. 1 Timothy 5:17 "The elders who rule well are to be considered worthy of double honor, especially those who work hard at preaching and teaching."

Dunes

Hey everyone I hope that the summer adventures in America are beginning and the distress of end of the year is over for all my student friends out there. Here in Brazil it is just getting near the middle of the second quarter. The school year begins in Jan and goes through June then they have off the month of July, and then back to school through November, and off for December. I guess the up side of it is they only go to school for about 4 hours a day. But they also start at 18 months to 2 years old and have four grades of kindergarten. So i guess every system has ups and downs.

To my surprise down here the directors (what most schools call the Principle in the states) of the schools are elected by popular vote of teachers and students. Imagine if that were the case in the states. You don't have to have any special qualification or degrees. If the people you work with and teach like you more than the other people available you get elected. As you would rightly guess this does not lead to a well organized or efficient means of placing administration. And more often than not those placed in the position are unqualified or unequipped to handle the tasks and demands of the job. so it also seems to be an inefficient means of running a school as well with little consistency from year to year. But then again I have not really seen much in the public system here that does.

ok sorry about that I intended to write about the youth group trip we are taking out to the dunes down at the beach and got caught up in the schools. Well . . so . . the youth group is taking the first trip of the year down to the sand dunes at the beach. For many of these kids it will be the first time they are actually going to get out of their neighborhoods, much less the city. Many of these kids have rarly been farther from their house than they could walk or bike in a few minutes, so it is a big deal for them to be heading down to the beach. Even though it is only a 45 min drive most of the kids have never seen the ocean. So tonight out on the sand dunes with a bonfire and wiener roast will be an unusual treat for many of them. I felt it was also a great opportunity being so far away from the city and light pollution (from the lights not the level of pollution) to see all the stars and talk about biblical creation. Just like in America the schools here are filled with the teachings of evolution and Darwinism.

So while the kids are going to be soaking up all the new sights sounds and experiences that this trip is offering I am going to try and take advantage of their open mind and pour in some truth about where we all came from. So with the sound of the ocean crashing against the beach and a canopy of unbelievable stars over head we are going to look back at how it all began. So it is noon right now in Mossoro, Brazil and at about 8pm we will begin teaching so if you have a couple moments and would like to pray for these kids and that their hearts would be open to the Word of God and the leading of the Spirit tonight. And that this trip would be a way of opening them up to more of the truth that God is offering to them.

Thanks for your prayers and time in reading my ramblings. May His hand be upon you in everything you do in His name.

Unknown

Have you ever had someone tell you something about yourself that truly shocked you? Well I must say I just had that experience tonight. I was talking with someone and they told me that they were truly afraid of me. They felt that I could or would physically harm them. And I must say that this really hit my hard. I do not consider myself to be a violent person, or even have the intent or desire to harm anyone. I understand that I am a big person compared to some other people, but by no means have I ever considered myself an imposing figure. So I was in a state of shock a bit when I was told this. It was not a joke, I could see real fear in their eyes when they said it. I have to admit that I am struggling with this a little bit. The thought that I am capable of striking real and deep fear into the heart of someone really has taken me aback. I am just not sure what to do with that. I feel as if my character has been shaken a bit with this. I am even at a loss of words to really describe how this makes me feel at the moment other than a bit hurt. I know that the intent of this person was not to hurt me but I do not know how else to describe it. I . . . I just really do not know what to do with this. I am not sure how I should feel about this. Or if there is something I should be doing with it at the moment. It is just kinda stuck in my head and spinning there. I mean I believe that anyone is capable of causing harm on another in situations that may arise. I do not believe that there is a person alive now in the past or the future to come that is beyond the reach of violence if the right set of circumstances arise in their life. But to be confronted with this possibility in myself at this moment has just thrown me for a loop and has sent my head and heart reeling. I guess I really should not be surprised that it is true, but I just never have thought of myself in that way. As someone who could intentionally and with premeditation cause harm upon another person. So for all of you out there in the electronic world I would like to hear your thoughts, and if you have ever had feelings or thoughts like this about me I would really like to know. I do not want to the guy walking around that people are afraid of but doesn't seem to notice or care, or maybe even likes it. I want to be approachable and available to people and not have them be frightened of me for any reason if I can help it. so here is your invitation to help me out and maybe find a way to keep from that happening. please post on this or if you want email me at ericl.townsend@gmail.com . thanks.

Half done

Ok yes my time here is over half done, but I am officially half done with my preaching. I did number three last night and three more to go before I can turn it over to Ron and retire from the pulpit. Last nights sermon has been the most difficult for me so far. I was working through Ephesians 5:6-10 and trying my best to stick with just the text and the implications of it with out adding too much outside information. That is alot tougher than it sounds, or at least it is for me. Expository preaching is much harder than just being able to tell a story from the Bible and tell people how it should impact their lives. Jeff if you are reading this I think you would have been pleased with me. With translation the timing was just about 45 minutes and I stayed on topic for most of the time I think ;).

This week I do not have to prepare a lesson for the Youth Group as the are doing a beach excursion and bonfire so I will have a bit more time to relax and think this week. I have really been enjoying the time in study but the time behind the pulpit still scares me. I always feel like I am not communicating well my intent and am afraid that people are not understanding and then I feel like I am just wasting their time. James 3:1 "Let not many of you become teachers, my brethren, knowing that as such we will incur a stricter judgment." And this does not help ease my feelings of inadequacy to teach the word of God. Like trying to handle the word of God with reverence was not hard enough but those that are called to do so are placed under stricter guidelines for judgment. Wow thanks I wasn't already worried enough that what I was capable of doing was not worthy now I have to deal with a heavier burden. I guess sometimes ignorance can be bliss, as long as knowledge is never needed.

Well, as I sit and think about my time running down here past the half way point in many aspects two things strike me. One that I am again struck by how unqualified I am to be a teacher or preacher of the word of God, yet for some crazy reason I am given opportunity time and again to be just that. And while I believe that it is not for some heavenly gag reel that god places me in this positions I can only claim as Paul did that it is through my weakness that His power is displayed fully. It is only when in my flesh I can not carry the burden that He becomes evident in my life to be seen by those around me. I can only hope and pray that I am not trying to strive beyond my own strength and therefore hindering the view of others of the Light that is God shining forth. and Second that no matter where I go people are not that different at heart. Yes we may all speak different languages, have different customs, and even look different, but inside we are all struggling with the same issues, tempted by the same things and all fall into the same sins. Solomon said that there is nothing new under the sun. And if it was true in his day it is certainly still true in our. Though the times have changed there is nothing new and all people are the same. Though we are separated by culture, language, ideals, and many other things we are all the same inside and there is no division among us that can not be overcome if we look to what unites us and not to what it is that divides us. 1 Corinthians 1:10 "I appeal to you, brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another so that there may be no divisions among you and that you may be perfectly united in mind and thought." While I do believe it is important to hold fast to the truth of scripture the things of this world that separate us are only man made divisions and can be done away with. May God bless us all with a mind towards unity and fellowship and not division and hate.

Hey sorry for the absence

I know it has been several weeks since I posted on here, and there is no excuse but I have been busy. For some of you you might want to sit down for this, but I have been preaching here the last couple weeks. One of the families here went on furlough and they needed someone to full in for a couple weeks and I was asked. I agreed. Now for the real shocker I even volunteered for a few extra weeks. Yes I know. I do not enjoy being behind the pulpit, but there was a need to be filled and that is why I came here so I filled it. I just hope that it is adequate and I do not bring their church crumbling down as the rush for the door proceeds ;) . It has been interesting having to preach through a translator, because if I even thought about preaching in Portuguese I would probably choke on my own tongue trying to pronounce everything. The one bad part about preaching is that I no longer have as much time to study Portuguese so I have noticed a considerable decline in my learning curve. :( but it is only for another 4 weeks and then hopefully I can get back to learning the language in full swing. I actually made it out to the beach two weeks ago and it was beautiful except for the fact that under the amazingly peaceful surface of the ocean tides coming in are these horrendously sharp rocks scattered around in the nice soft sand and ended up with a slice in between my big two and next toe on my left foot and several small scrapes and puncture wounds on my right foot. But other than that it was a pretty amazing time. the scenery was beautiful and even got to see a few dolphins playing in the ocean. I also celebrated my 33 birthday a little early last night with about 25 people from the school and church I have been helping with. It was a fun night that I would not mind repeating angain with maybe just a little more help next time. I got shrimp to grill but unlike the nice supermarkets in the states they come whole here. So the process of cutting off the heads, shelling them, and cleaning them took quite a bit of time. not to mention that these lived up to their name as shrimp. But I grilled them just the same. Also got a hunk of loin and butchered it and cleaned it up then cut it into steaks and marinated them along with some chicken and sausages. I made German potato salad, fruit salad, and cheese cake. All in all it was a good time had by all, and come to find out that smoke behaves the same south of the equator as it does north of it. It finds you no matter where you try to run from it. So as soon as my non-smokers smokers cough quits all will be better. OH and I really miss my Kingsford Hickory Wood Charcoal :(. Well hope you aer all doing well and see you in another 2 months back in the states. Tchau.

Facing fears

Ok now I know we all have fears, and then there are just things that we don't like, well I am not really sure which this is, but starting Sunday May 16th I get to preach at the Christ is Life Baptist Church down here in Brazil. I agreed to do it because there is a need for it and my purpose in coming was to help meet needs that the mission has while I am here and to lend assistance in what ever way that I can. So I am going to start preaching. I have had some experience with preaching and enjoy the study and digging into the Word to make sure that what I am teaching is as close to the truth that is contained within the Word as I can get to. I even really enjoy teaching and helping people with understanding scripture, but what I do not like about preaching is two things. The first is that I have always felt like I am just talking at people and not interacting with them. It has always felt like a cold and impersonal way in which to disseminate the Word of God, but I do understand the good it can have in the lives of people that do not get the Word in any other form; and even for those that do it is a different way of getting it which can also be beneficial. And I am so thankful that God has gifted people with a heart for His Word that enjoy that part of spreading His Word. The second is, yes I am scared of standing in front of groups of people and being the center of attention (which is one of the other reasons I accepted this opportunity and even offered to go beyond the limits of the initial request to preach for more weeks than they asked. I do not like having fear and am hoping to use this opportunity to begin to overcome one of mine. I believe that fear is one of two things. The first is that it is a God given feeling to help us avoid activities and situations that are harmful to us, and second is that it is a weakness in us that we are unwilling to face and overcome. I know that this fear is the second and I do not like having something in my life that is hindering me in becoming something that I could be. I am not saying that I aspire to be a Billy Graham in the future, but I do not want to have my stomach turn in knots whenever there is the mention of public speaking. I want to be able to step up to the plate secure in the power of Christ to meet any opportunity that comes my way to spread and teach His Word no matter what the venue may be. I do not want to have to stand before the White throne and have to explain that the reason a soul was lost is because I was too afraid to stand up for His Word and speak the Truth to someone willing to listen because it was from a pulpit or in a public area. I do not want to continue to have the regrets that I might have missed an opportunity to encourage someone along their walk towards God because I did not want to deal with shaking knees because there are going to be people looking at me. So I am giving myself over into His hands and taking the steps to be free of this fear and I know that even though now fear overcomes me when i think about it, all things are possible with Him and if it is His will for me I will be able to meet this challenge as David before Goliath and I will not be one of the other soldiers quaking in my Armor before him.

Ponderings

Have you ever got the feeling that things just were not working out the way you thought they should, but couldn't put your finger on exactly how or why? If so then you know what I felt like Saturday night as I was teaching the youth group here. Now I understand that I am not a great teacher by any stretch of the imagination, but I have had a few years of experience working with youth of various ages and last night in the middle of my lesson I just felt like things were not working out as I believed they should have been after working with these kids for so many weeks. I think that working through a translator (which is mighty rough for those who have never had that experience) has definately slowed down the process of me getting to understand the personalities of these kids and how their minds work, but I just got the feeling last night that for some reason the lessons and teaching I have been presenting is just not reaching them. Now the missionary who is translating for me and his daughter keep telling me that the lessons have been really good and that I am doing a good job, but I definitely think things are going awry. the tough part is I do not know how to reach out to these kids and figure out what it is because I do not speak their language, in more ways than one. While the culture and language down here are much different than what I have worked with in the States before I think at a base level people are the same world wide, so I am struggling with what I can do to figure out first of all if what I am feeling is actually really happening, and secondly if it is what can i do about it. I could really use some prayers on this matter, because I do not want my time that I have with these kids wasted if there is something more I can be doing to reach them. I believe that some of them are not believers yet and several that claim faith are very weak and shallow in it. So I do not want to squander any opportunity I might have to help some come to see the truth or strengthen those that are still crawling into faith. I myself know what it is to struggle in faith and the difficulties in reaching out to others for help to work through those issues and I do not want to turn any of them away because I was unable to overcome something and therefore become a hindrance to their walk. Please if you have any ideas on ways of reaching out to Brazilian or Hispanic youth I would appreciate your insights and more so your prayers.

BGFM Field Conference April 12-19

The week of April 12-19 was the annual field conference for the mission. All the missionaries in the country converge on a single location and discuss all the issues that need to be settled that affect them all. This year it was talking about changing the vision for the future of the mission and the new areas that they want to reach out into. They also talked about the leadership structure that needs to be in place to make this new vision a reality. It was interesting to see and talk with the different missionaries and their thoughts and ideas on both of these subjects. I also enjoyed getting to meet and interact with many of the kids of the missionaries. They had a VBS program going on for the children while the parents were in meetings during the mornings, and had church services every night of the conference. The VBS program was a military theme about being in the Army of God and the kids of all ages (some 30+) had a good time marching around singing cadence and doing military activities. All were dressed in camouflage and learned how to stand at attention. The final program on Sunday night was pretty fun to watch as the kids recited bible verses that they had memorized and sang songs that they had learned. Many recieved prizes of a military style and were proudly showing them off. Although now a week later I must admit that I am a bit burned out on the VBS songs (as the kids here in Mossoro) continue to sing them and even argue sometime about what the words are supposed to be. But I am sure i will die off soon and they all had a good time so I guess I can deal with it for a few weeks. The resort we stayed at was beautiful and had spectacular views of the ocean. The food on the other had was not the greatest and I am sure that at some points during the week we were eating leftovers. Also, myself and 5 others caught ear infections from one of the resort's pools, so the cleanliness standard is much less that would be expected from any resort in America. While many things would not meet American standards in many countries around the world it was overall a nice experience even though I was bed ridden for two days because of the ear infection. I am finally getting to the end of the ear infection and I still have great memories and new friends from the Conference. Got to spend two days at the beach and one of them was at low tide so the reef just off the beach was accessible on foot and got to walk along the reef and see some interesting sea life. I think it will be interesting to come back in another 5 years and see how the new vision for 2020 is coming along. They have a goal of expanding into several new cities and areas of the country. May God continue to Bless all their work here in Brazil. while Brazil is considered by may to be an evangelized country because of the large cultural influence that Catholicism has here mush of that is just that cultural. The number of believers is much less. Almost every car or truck on the road has some paraphernalia to do with Jesus or God many of them are just bumper stickers people put on thinking it will protect them in some way like a talisman would. Their belief and understanding of true faith is very limited and shallow.

Staff Retreat April 9-11

The teachers from Alfa (the missionaries school) had a staff retreat that I got to tag along on. The principle being taught at the retreat was about personalities and how to interact better and understanding the reasons why people do thing certain ways. If any of you have ever taken a personality test you understand a little of what went on at the retreat. There was a gentleman that traveled up to the mountains to give the personality test to all the teachers and other staff and then explain how each of the four personalities behave in both positive and negative ways. It was fun to watch how the teachers reacted when a personality trait that was extremely evident in one of them was talked about. There was a lot of laughing and a good time was had by all. The retreat center we stayed at was the ongoing project of another missionary team with BGFM. It is still in the construction stages but is very nice and the food and hospitality was fantastic. Everyone that went had a great time and we played lots of new games to me.
Even the 6 hour drive to and from the retreat center was fun. I got to see many new areas here in Brazil. While 6 hours would seem like I would have covered a lot of terrain, until you have seen the roads done here in Brazil it is hard to realize why on a highway with a posted speed limit of 110 kilometers and hour you can only go less than 400 kilometers in 6 hours. Even the extreme pothole situation in Omaha after this hard winter would be considered great road conditions for many of the places around here. So be thankful that we have such nice roads. It was interesting that Brazil has their military out building the new interstate system. Something maybe America ought to think about. They figured since they were already paying the military they might as well be out doing something since they are not involved in any wars, and do not plan on being in any. They have a very cavalier attitude towards other nations in that as long as they do not become directly impacted by what is going on they do not care.

Easter morning

So this morning the church here had a Sunrise morning breakfast with praise and worship after wards and a reading of the resurrection account. Though it was all in Portuguese, what little of the language I am beginning to understand helped me to track with the story recognizing words here and there as it was read. While it did sprinkle for a little and chased a few underneath the awnings, some stayed out in the rain and praised God also for the wonderful chuva (rain) that He was giving them. If you haven't figured out this rainy season has been a bit dry and everyone, not

just farmers, have been praying ceaselessly for the heavens to open up and pour forth, while it may not truly be Jesus' water of life, it is a blessing all the same. Everyone that came this morning had a wonderful time, and just as with potlucks in many churches back in the states there was more than enough food to go around, although almost all of it was carbs. No eggs and sausage to be had here :(. But it was a great time to be together worshiping the raising of Christ and praying for His speedy return.

Sorry for the long pause in between updates. There has been a few technical issues here with the internet that are getting worked out slowly. I pray that you all had a blessed week and that your worship time Friday and today was and will be a true raising of your spirit and soul. Blessings upon each of you.

Well so it has been another week

Ok well I last updated you all on Thursday so I figured it was time to do another one. There has been no major events to really talk about other than celebrating the birthday of the Stucky's youngest daughter Anabel on Friday She turned ten, a major milestone for her as she reached double digits.

There continues to be construction going on at the school as the keep expanding to accommodate the growing school population and make plans for a library and expanding into high school. Currently the school only goes through 9th grade which here is part of junior high. Come to think of it I should take some pictures of the construction and post them so you can see the difference in the type and style of construction that goes on here. Because the temperature does not very to the same degree as it does in places like, well Omaha they do not use insulation of any kind in the walls, glass, if they have any at all, in the windows is pretty thin, and they use the slate tile roofs. Most of the walls are built with many holes in the to allow for ventilation because their biggest concern is the breeze to keep the heat at bay. So, at the school they are getting ready to put the ceiling beams in place so they can pour the new roof over the library and a new classroom.

In other news I have officially been here for three weeks. It is not the longest I have been anywhere or anything like that, but it seems strange still for some reason. In all the places I have been and traveled to, in some cases for months, for the first time I really feel out of place here. I am here to see, and experience what it is to be a missionary over a longer period than my 2 weeks experience back in 2005 allowed. And well I guess I have met that mark a little. Because the language and cultural barriers have just now started to hit me. No, I didn't speak Portuguese before or anything, but now it is starting to really feel like a handicap by not speaking the language. I can't explain why up until now it didn't feel like so much of a barrier, but I am really starting to feel how little I can do with out the help of someone else along, and the feeling of being a drain on the resources and time of the missionaries I am staying with might actually be hindering their ministry. While they would never say that even if I asked I have to wonder what else they could be doing or accomplish if they didn't have to translate for me or walk me through the process of simple things like buying groceries because I can not read the packaging, or answering all the questions I have about the culture and reasons for why things are done a certain way. While this is normal and expected of new comers to the field, where generally they take a year of language school before hitting the field, I still wonder if this experience for me is causing a soul that could have been saved to be lost because they are spending that time with me. I don't know just the ramblings of my mind as I sat yesterday morning and pondered on my experience here over a three week period.

I pray that each of you is doing well, and the warmer temperature in the States spelling the begining of Spring is bringing joy to you.

Bats in the Belfry

Ok I don’t know how you all feel about bats, but I am not sure I have made up my mind just yet about them. I am going to state up front that I am not afraid of bats, but I am not sure at this point how close of proximity I want to be with bats on a regular basis. Bats, like snakes, are good because they eat bugs and other vermin that we as humans seem to be unfriendly towards. In Nebraska we love anything that eats mosquitoes so I can appreciate anything that helps with that issue, but that doesn’t mean I want to share my bedroom with them. Down here I have seen more bats and frogs in the two weeks that I have been here than I think I do in an entire year back in Omaha. Mostly because at night around here frogs literally climb out of the ground all over the place so that you need to be careful where you are walking in the dark or you might step on one or as I have done a few time kick one without realizing it is there at first. Again they are good because they eat lots of bugs, but that whole idea of sharing my private living space with them is a whole different story. Or as was the case near the end of last week when Lori went into her store room and let out a yell because as she turned the light on there was a pretty good sized frog staring her right in the eyes. Somehow it had found its way into the store room and up on top of her salad spinner 5 ft off the ground. If you figure that one out you are a better investigator than me because I didn’t see any ladder of items that could have facilitated its climb to that height. Or a day or so before when Lori was entering the same store room and ducked as a bat flew out when the light came on. Not to mention that there are ants everywhere. No not the giant red flying ones (or at least not yet) but your normal everyday pest that crawls around in long lines of marching soldiers. Everyone just tells me it is just a part of life that there will be ants around. You keep them at bay as best you can by wiping off every counter and table top several times a day, you have a small bucket with a lid for food items to be tossed into instead of the regular garbage can, and you rinse your dishes off before you set them near the sink to be washed. This as I said only keeps them manageable. Those Tupperware items you think seal well will not always keep the horde of ants out of them. So what do you do when they get into something? You tap on the container a few times and they begin to turn and march back out the same way they entered and within a few moments they will be out and you carry on as if you didn’t know they had ever been in there. And if you happen to see a straggler you pick it out as need be. Yes you may not get them all out, so just consider it added protein in your diet if that happens. Ok so back to the reason for this post the bats. As most of you are aware there is a pool here that I have been extremely grateful for to kill the heat of the day when evening rolls around. Well, as I have mentioned to some of you it gets dark here between 5:30-6 pm every night. So normally when anyone is getting into the pool it is on the darker side of things which also helps to dissipate the heat. But back to the story; well they do not use lights around the pool because as many of you know lights attract bugs, and no one wants bugs so no lights (they also use electricity which here is really expensive) so there is nothing to frighten the bats away from one of the few plentiful water sources in the area. As I have mentioned also it is supposed to be the rainy season here and there has not even been an inch total of rain this entire month for them, so things are getting a bit parched all over. So every night as the bats are out doing their duty eating all the bugs in the area they make runs to get a drink from the pool (unless there is just so much noise that they are scared off but it has to be a lot). They look like little navy fighters shooting the runway on an aircraft carrier as they swoop down in a path that just skims the surface of the water and veer off just before hitting the garage at the end of the pool deck. Or sometimes they do it in reverse, but it is a constant show for several minutes every so often as they get thirsty in the evening heat, which is 86 right now at 9pm. So, as people are swimming or just trying to relax in the pool there is a constant presence of little fighter bats refueling from the pool. And every so often they do not give proper clearance to the people there so sometimes you might look up and see a bat flying right at your face to have them shift away moments before impact. So as I said I have not completely made up my mind about the proximity of the bats to my daily living space. How do I tell the bat the he is violating my personal space bubble ;) . Well enough rambling for the night. Hope you are all doing well, and I ask for your prayers as I have been asked to give another lesson to the youth group this Saturday. I guess my last one was good enough that they want me to do it again. Hopefully I will make use of the previous experience and do better this time. God Bless you all.

Youth Group 3-13-10

Ok so I got my first opportunity to actual work with some of the kids here. I was given the chance to write and give the first lesson for the Youth Group at the church that the Stucky’s started. The youth group sort of disbanded about a year and a half ago and they are just now getting it started back up again. IT was a bit of a challenge given that I only had a day and a half to prepare a lesson that crossed both cultural and language barriers and could be given in a manner facilitating translation. So I would say a sentence and then wait as it was translated and then go again. It was like speaking only on the down stroke of an engine so it was a little rough to begin with. Trying to figure out a way to reach the kids ages 12-22 in a relevant and meaningful way was the next hurdle. That is a pretty big age difference to be able to get something useful to the older individuals and still understandable and meaningful to the younger ages. I hope it worked out. I used the story of the conquering of Jericho as a base for how God does things differently than man does. I tried to retell the story with a little more modern theme and in a Brazilian setting. They got a laugh out of some of the cultural identifiers I threw in there. It really helps that I have been here before and have been in contact with Ken over the years. It was also a bit rocky trying to get the kids to speak up, but given it was the first night it wasn’t all that unexpected because they are just getting to know each other and aren’t too sure how far they want to stretch out and open up in a new surrounding and atmosphere. I am hoping I kept their attention enough to get the point across that I was shooting for, which was simply God has plans for us that do not always match up with what the world thinks we should be doing and we can either live for the pleasures of this day or the joy God has for us later. Ken seemed to think it translated well, and was a good point to start off the year with, but I guess only time will tell that. I also presented a challenge to the kids on some scripture memorization. They are supposed to memorize Psalm 23 in English (which will be tougher for some than others) and Psalm 32 in Portuguese. I gave them plenty of time until June 1 to do it, so I hope they surprise me and actually do it. Memorization in this culture I am told is an important factor so I hope that helps. Well Hope all is well with you all and that God has been blessing you as you go about your days with opportunities to share in the hope and joy that you have in Jesus. Tschau.

Be praying for these kids, several do not live in Christian homes and though it maybe hard to believe the display of sexual immorality is even more common place here than in the states.

more pictures Click Here the youth group pics are near the end of the album